JOWEEEEEN

this is everything i didn't say

the second semester

Saturday, 20 January 2018 || 8:44 pm

the first two weeks of january passed really quickly - the weather was colder than normal and i literally spent the whole day staying at home. and the semester starts.

first week of school felt really weird, and i do still feel like a frenzy in school. it had been more than a month since i last stepped foot into ntu, and coming back for introductory lectures.. not something i would want to do if i had a choice. i didn't have lessons on monday and wednesday because there are no tutorials on the first week of school, and i just added another mod which lectures are on monday mornings 9.30am. gotta brace myself for the upcoming semester since i'm taking more AUs than i did last semester - lessons until 7pm, super long breaks in between my lessons, and an online mod.

having gone for half of my lectures this past week, i think the most interesting mod will be visual literacy and communication (i will update how it turns out at the end of the semester). the professor watches films and listens to music for a living. we'll be heading to singapore arts museum and lasalle for our lessons. lectures will most probably end earlier than normal. the supposedly 3 hour long introductory lecture lasted... 30 minutes. and the mod that will probably test my limits is news reporting and writing. it's a gateway mod for journalism, and the first lecture which was an hour long was stressful enough i don't know how i will be able to survive 12 weeks of 2-hours long tutorials. i need to cultivate habits such as reading the news for this mod. and having to improve on my english as well. i feel so stress already! we'll see if i will be alive after the first tutorial.

12 more weeks of school, 12 more weeks to pull up my gpa.

till next time x

#jbjinsg jbj first fan meeting come true in singapore

Monday, 8 January 2018 || 2:06 pm

for singaporean joyfuls, the year couldn't have ended off on a better note as JBJ held their first fan meeting in Singapore. JBJ is a group of 6 members who participated in Produce 101 Season 2, did not make it to the top 11, but was later formed because of their popularity among the fans. with their contract only 7 months long, fans would want to meet them before it ends, and it was a dream come true for singaporean joyfuls on the second last day of 2017.

the atmosphere at big box was high even 4 hours before the show, as fans were queuing for merchandise and giving out freebies. at random times, shrieks of happiness could be heard as fans take part in a lucky draw and if they were lucky enough, they could receive a signed poster from the members themselves.

at 6pm sharp, most fans were seated in the venue. purple and yellow balloons could be seen among the crowd, an initiated fan project. the lights dimmed and a roaring cheer greeted JBJ onstage as they started performing the intro, followed by their debut track, Fantasy. this was followed by a short talking segment when the boys introduced themselves, which received loud cheers. the members also talked about having chili crab the day before and attending media interviews. the members were then asked to answer questions on post its which fans have written prior to the fan meeting. hyunbin rapped a little, taehyun talked about what they did the previous day, and yongguk winked multiple times to the audience! the next two songs, from today and as if in a dream, were more chill as fans can be seen waving their fanboards along, clearly mesmerised by the boys. the next segment was an interesting one as jbj were tasked to decorate a cake each within 3 minutes. afterwhich, they would draw lots so that 6 lucky fans could bring home the cakes! we witnessed hyunbin eating a strawberry sexily, taehyun popping a chocolate into his mouth, and donghan taking off his outerwear which made the fans scream. we saw the clumsy side of hyunbin as he picked up his cake but it slid off the cake rotator which soiled his outerwear! but all's good as the lucky fan who won his cake said that it was okay even if the cake was out of shape! after picking out winners for the customised cake, jbj extended their fan service as they picked 2 more winners each who will get to have a one-to-one meet and greet session and even take a picture with them personally! how lucky! the next segment was a dance battle as the group were split into pairs, performing some of the pd101 songs from the "35 boys 5 concepts" stages, which got the fans - avid produce fans - screaming and cheering. they ended off the dance battle segment performing the famous shape of you choreography with sharp movements. the last song that the boys sang was pretty, and as they went backstage, the fans started chanting for encore. they came back with their encore item, fantasy, and the song suddenly stopped, which shocked the members as well as some of the fans. but a fan-made video started playing, showing the boys' produce 101 and pre-debut days. taehyun even went backstage to get his phone to take some photos and videos! the night ended well with fantasy as confetti was being shot, and the boys interacted with the fans.

thank you jbj for ending off 2017 with a blast together with singapore joyfuls!

farewell, 2017

Tuesday, 2 January 2018 || 11:48 am

and just like that, a year has past and we welcome a new one. 2017 had been a roller coaster ride for me, good things happened and there were lows as well. it was a year of many first times and changes as well. as i do almost every year, this post will be a reflection of what happened this past year as well as my resolutions for the upcoming year.

attending 4 kpop fanmeetings.
one of the few highlights of this year is attending kpop fanmeets of a few of my favourite groups- for free. i did have my kpop phase back in primary school, but it died and i got into kpop again in march 2016 after our CAs. seventeen was, and still is my ult group, and i slowly gained interest in other kpop groups as well. pentagon's first showcase was our first kpop fanmeet, and it was a memorable experience. my sister won 2 pairs of tickets just a night before the fanmeet, and we got to enjoy the benefits of hi-touch and photo op. what an experience! i also got to see sf9 that same month, even fetching them from the airport and having interactions with them. seventeen came to singapore for the second time in september but we didn't attend their concert. :-( in december, however, with my sister's luck again, we saw vixx and jbj!! it was a crazy month to end the year. really grateful to be able to catch 4 kpop groups this past year! sick choreography, lit atmosphere, loved the experiences.

work.
i've been working almost every year end since i was 15. but this year, because of the extended holidays after A levels, i worked for a company for 6 months. that's half a year. it was crazy. i'm really grateful to be able to work there and meet many new and friendly people. it was a bit emotional for me on my last day, because of the experiences i've had working there.

ndp.
it had been years since we participated in ndp, and we joined again this year. it was a different experience compared to our participation in 2012. this year, we saw some of our friends who were serving in ns having duties. and this year, we were seniors. nonetheless, it was a fun experience, being able to dance again, get my weekly exercise, and make new friends who are mostly younger than us. also, trying to search for ameerul every week through the sea of performers because sometimes he's there, sometimes he's not.

piercings.
if you have met me with my hair tied up before, you'd probably notice the number of piercings i have especially on my left ear. in addition to my two lobe piercings i've had since i was young, i got another four piercings in 2017, all within 2 or 3 months. some of my friends even say i'm addicted to piercings but i really am not. i currently have two lobe piercings on my right ear, three lobe piercings on my left ear and a helix piercing on my left ear as well. and i'm planning to have more piercings. i just hope that people won't think that i'm crazy for having so many piercings, just because i look like a "good girl" to you, doesn't mean i should just have a pair of piercings. i pierced my second lobe on my left ear one day before A levels result was released, and pierced my third left lobe and second right lobe together, and my helix on a separate day. i just thought that the piercings were nice, that's all. as for my future piercings, it will probably to cover the pain of other stuff that's been ongoing. i don't know.

a levels results.
this day was such a nerve-wrecking day for me. i felt so scared, and even more nervous than i was when i was taking my A levels. i took a day off, and felt a little bit more relieved when we reunited with our jc classmates. as usual, before we were given our results, the principal would review the general grades for each subject and to our surprise, H2 history had 90+% ABs, and that was the best-performing subject for our cohort! my regret was my H1 math grade which i probably will never be able to forgive myself for. i didn't want to see my results at first, but xintien saw it and she said it was good and i reluctantly took a look at it. i was shocked when i saw my grades- they were not as bad as i thought they would be, but i feel like i could have done better. however, maybe because of the nature of arts subjects that i got the grades i received. i was surprised with my results because of how unprepared i was when i was sitting for my A level examinations. i probably said this before- i only started memorising for history 2 weeks before the paper, and i never finished all 5 of my lit texts. throughout my A level period, i only remember scribbling on my paper for the whole duration- that's a pure arts student for you. nonetheless, i was able to get the results i got, which allowed me to get into the course i was interested in, because of God.

starting university.
one of the major events that happened this year is starting university, without my sister. not having my sister with me in hall nor school is a huge change for me, since we have been in the same school for the past 12 years of education. there are bound to be times we have to separate, and university was it. i felt very insecure when uni started, from starting hall life to coping in school, i was alone for the first time. but i am grateful for the people i have met in ntu. firstly in hall, the simpsons family. my first group of friends in school whom i see almost every single day. thank you for accepting me and dealing with my uncontrollable laughter during hall camp and any other day when ya'll are being retarded. i'm really grateful to have yall because i can be really lupsup with you guys, something i can't really do in school. secondly, peralta. so thankful for the friendly people i've met that allowed me to be more comfortable when school started. staying in hall for the past semester was a new experience for me as it was the first time living away from home. i learnt to be independent, having to do house chores, packing my own things, settling my own meals, along with coping with school work. in school, after 8 months break, it was back to the study grind, and it was very different from the jc education system. i still am pretty confused about anything related to uni, and i better get things done before the second semester starts in two weeks. but yes. university had been overwhelming for me. there were times i feel so stressed out because of deadlines, but at the same time, i had my fair share of fun as well. i hope the rest of my semesters go well, i really do.

a new ministry.
starting university also meant joining a new ministry in church. we were no longer in the teens ministry, but we have moved on to the campus ministry. as a teen, i've always watched the campus ministry from afar, because they seem so hyped with so many activities while i was comfortable with my own group of friends. going to the campus ministry made me step out of my comfort zone. i joined a new dgroup, and have weekly bibletalks with the ntu ministry. i also joined the uni retreat in june alone without my sister who had work then. sometimes, i do feel uncomfortable and go back to my own small circle, or keeping to myself. i see how some of my friends are doing so well in the campus ministry just casually talking to everybody but i guess i need some time.

weetrip.
in school, i don't really join a lot of activities. but i decided to sign up for weetrip because ocip was something i liked to do, something i enjoyed doing, and i haven't done it in a long while. going to laos was such an eye-opening experience. though the 10 service days were pretty much a routine, i learnt many new things, including a new language, and made new friends during the trip as well. i do miss the cool weather in laos and the cute village kids and maybe, just maybe, the village life we lived while we were there. simple and no rush.

amethyx.
one of the craziest things i did this year was probably joining amethyx. it was a project to cover some of seventee's songs before seventeen performed in singapore. the group went through a lot during the few months drawing up to d-day, but we overcame the obstacles, had practices every tuesdays and thursdays, and gave our best on the actual day. it was my first time performing in years (unless ndp counts), and it was a new experience for me. carats were cheering for us, even when security wanted to chase us away. they did the fanchants, and while dancing, i was grateful to be in this fandom. to more dances in the year ahead!!

the slipped diss.
never have i thought that i would end the year performing for our church year end party. i was skeptical about joining the team, because i would be overseas for two weeks in december for weetrip, but still joined anyway. i thought performing with amethyx (13 members) would be the group with the most number of people i perform with, but i was wrong. we have 16 members in the slipped diss, and we only had full strength on d-day! really love this group of people, though i may be quiet and all, but they make the best jokes. i enjoyed myself every practice, and throughout the two months, i got to learn a new genre of dance and make friends with people from the poly side as well. being able to dance with tricia again as campus, no longer preteens, feels different. i'm really grateful for everyone who have put in effort for our 4-minute long performance which felt so short last night! from choreographers to non-dancers, and shoutout to weiliang who literally landed in singapore at 4pm on the 31st! though there may have been mistakes made during our performance, we had fun, and we glorified God with our item, and that's all that matters. thank you all!

this year had been an interesting one, different from others. many things happened, of which most of them are "first times" for me. i am grateful for the opportunities given to me, all the experiences i've gotten, and all the friends who stuck with me this year. i'm someone who is terrible at making and maintaining friendships. i feel like i'm a boring and awkward person and anyone else would be a better person to talk to. to the people whom i've crossed path with this past year, thank you.

2018 will definitely not be an easier year for me. there will be more challenges and struggles, and i hope to be able to overcome them with God. to grow closer to God and to be disciplined in my studies, would be my main aim for this year. friendship-wise, we'll see how it goes.

till next time x